Concertina Limericks

[Steve_freereeder]

A moral tale on the benefits of regular practice:

 

There was a young lady named Sarah,

Whose concertina did scare her,

But she stuck to her squeezing,

And the bellows kept wheezing,

And wrong notes got rarer and rarer.

 

Keep it up, m'Lady. You're doing fine!

[Jody Kruskal]

A true story...

 

John Kirkpatrick’s sly banter is fun

At a concert he told everyone

“While playing this hard tune

My mind exits the room

I’ll see you all soon when I’m done”

[fidjit]

So after reading some posts on another thread what about some concertina limericks?

 

 

A concertina player from Rack mines

Played limericks with only two lines

[geoffwright]

I sang 'till I made myself hoarse

so tried out an anglo by Morse,

then a Triumph duet, an english by Whet-

stone but settled on a Jeffries, of course.

 

The first clean one I have ever written in my life!

Sorry.

[JimLucas]

...an english by Whet-stone...

Is that in "old pitch"? I.e.,

sharp

?

[Leo]

...an english by Whet-stone...

Is that in "old pitch"? I.e.,

sharp

?

I thought of it as a practice instrument to give someone an edge to hone their skills and then grind out the tunes.

 

Thanks

Leo

[Marien]

...an english by Whet-stone...

Is that in "old pitch"? I.e.,

sharp

?

 

a beautiful lady from Norwich

played technically well but in old pitch

for getting some cash in

but soon realisin’

to sell is the way to get rich

[RustyH]

Oh, I'm mightily entertained.....hmmmm.....or is that easily?

[JimLucas]

Oh, I'm mightily entertained.....hmmmm.....or is that easily?

Mighty easy to entertain?

[Robert Booth]

Hmmm... It occurs to me that the Popeye song:

 

I yam popeye the sailor man

I yam Popeye the sailor man

I likes to swimmin'

with bowlegged wimmen

I yam popeye the sailor man

 

is a musical limerick.

 

Any others around that you can think of?

 

RB

[Richard Morse]

Hmmm... It occurs to me that the Popeye song...

Interesting! The Popeye song I'm familiar with goes like this:

I'm Popeye the sailor man,

I live in a garbage can.

I eat all my spinach

And spit out the winnage,

I'm Popeye the sailor man.

Of course I had no idea what "winnage" was when I was a kid but now I'm wondering if it was "windage"?

 

-- Rich --

[Marien]

Oh, I'm mightily entertained.....hmmmm.....or is that easily?

Mighty easy to entertain?

 

depends on the audience...

[Jody Kruskal]

My hip teenage daughter Louise

Leaves the room when I take out my squeeze

Her brows start to furrow

When I play Trip to Durrow

“How uncool can you get, Daddy. Geez!”

[Chris Drinkwater]

My hip teenage daughter Louise

Leaves the room when I take out my squeeze

Her brows start to furrow

When I play Trip to Durrow

“How uncool can you get, Daddy. Geez!”

 

Heee, heee. V. nice Jody. Another one of your hidden talents?

 

Chris

[drbones]

Any others around that you can think of?

 

RB

I thought it was this....

 

I'm Popeye the Sailor Man

I'm Popeye the Sailor Man

I'm strong to the finich

Cause I eats me spinach

I'm Popeye the Sailor Man

Toot Toot!

 

Maybe the "Toot Toot" was the windage Mr Morse mentioned.

 

Edited due to wrong original quote.

Edited December 16, 2008 by drbones

[Leo]

Interesting! The Popeye song I'm familiar with goes like this:

I'm Popeye the sailor man,

I live in a garbage can.

I eat all my spinach

And spit out the winnage,

I'm Popeye the sailor man.

Of course I had no idea what "winnage" was when I was a kid but now I'm wondering if it was "windage"?

 

-- Rich --

I must have grown up on the wrong side of the tracks. I always thought winnage had to do with gambling. If I have $10 and bet five and loose it it's called lossage. If I bet two more and win back three then one of the three is called winnage. (It takes me back up to $6). It's how I learned some math, or maybe a Phliladelphia local thing.

 

Still from the wrong side:

I'm Popeye the sailor man,

I live in a frying pan.

I turned on the gas

and burned off my

self

.

I'm Popeye the sailor man.

 

Thanks

Leo

[drbones]

Up in the riggin’

I was playin’ n swiggin’

Quietly so’s not to get caught

If the cap’n had found me

He’d surely have ground me

Drinkin’s not allowed up aloft

 

Thought I was sneaky

But my squeezebox was squeaky

So took another drink instead

Got a bit tipsy

Squeezebox went flipsy

Hit the cap’n square on the head

 

Now I’m down below

In the ship’s brig ye know

Feelin’ the pain of my ways

The fault is me own

So I’m here all alone

Been sentenced to twenty nine days.

 

When I get out

I’ll be a changed man no doubt

I’ll make my peace with the Lord

Oh I’ll still be drinkin’

But not playin, I’m thinkin’

The Cap’n threw Tina overboard.

[Chris Drinkwater]

There was an old squeezer from Devon,

Who died and went up to heaven.

And when asked "What do you play?"

He replied "The anglo, all day,

But at night, I sing till eleven!"

 

--------------------------------------------------------

 

An aspiring young poet, name Stan,

Couldn't make the lines on his limmericks, scan,

So he tried both haiku and verse,

But the results were even worse,

So he flushed the lot down the pan.

 

Chris

Edited December 18, 2008 by Chris Drinkwater