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Flash-Townsend defects, shock, horror


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Mendlesham, UK, March 28, ABC-MIDIA NEWS –

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Top English concertina player defects

 

The concertina world was expected to be facing a major riff-t and be bellowsed with shock after Dave Townsend was discovered to have gone over to the Melodeon Fraktion. When confronted, Townsend admitted to have been working secretly for some time on a new playing system which would be rolled out across the national curriculum….for melodeons… and launching a new wave of child musicians.

 

Townsend came under suspicion when a melodeon two-row player was seen to have infiltrated the Whitehaven Volunteers’ Militia group (a free reed cell set up for ‘any concertina system’ ) here at the EATMT 2010 M&M meeting. The name of the session ‘“You’ll have to learn this one!” was clearly not about tunes, but a subtle brainwashing tactic against the beginner/intermediate concertina players attending. Interestingly, Townsend is understood to have complimented the melodeon player a number of times during the workshop.

 

Townsend was finally fingered when a photographer later caught him in full conductor mode, gleefully rehearsing his method to an empty classroom. As can be seen from the photo, the method is based on melodeons with up to 20 buttons in a maximum two-row 9x9+2 layout, but the key to each configuration was not immediately clhear .

 

The real breakthrough is that he seems to have developed a one-button instrument – it can just be made out to the far left of the Siegfried-style teaching line, adopted from the music halls. Such an instrument would be very easy to hide and operate clandestinely.

 

Townsend refused to comment further and just grinned melodeoniacally. The full picture only emerged after EATMT, although suspicions had been aroused later in the day when he dragged a giant bass accordion out onto the floor to conduct, with The Deep Force, his advance concertina group at the EATMT show case performances.

 

When contacted, the UN ICA (the UN Intelligible Centratina Agency) issued a statement saying a committee of investigation would soon be set up to study the implications and decide what action would have to be taken. When pressed, a senior UN ICA member simply breathed a long soundless, sigh and drummed the table with their fingers. :blink: :blink:

 

Note: A forensic examination of the picture shows, secreted at the bottom right, a copy of 'One Snowy Night' and 'Farmyard gardens' both believed to contain songs such as Midnight Hop and Gardener's Delight, suggesting melodeonic collusion between Townsend and other well-known composer/players.

Edited by Kautilya
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I was a bit mystified why this topic was posted twice, so I merged the topics. We're trying to cut down on duplicate posts; let me know we can take one of these posts out. Thanks.

 

Guess we're getting an early start on April 1st?

 

Ken

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The concertina world was expected to be facing a major riff-t and be bellowsed with shock after Dave Townsend was discovered to have gone over to the Melodeon Fraktion.

Dave, of course, has been playing both (English) concertina and melodeon (also fiddle) for years, decades, and I might even say centuries (i.e., parts of both the 20th and 21st). So have several others of our illustrious membership, not the least being Danny Chapman, aka ratface.

 

I'm frankly appalled at your blatant attempt to incite boxist prejudice in this group. :ph34r:

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One of the first inspiring English Concertina players I heard was Dave Townsend - a friend at university introduced me to a new Buckinghamshire ceilidh band he was very fond of called the Hemlock Cock & Bull Band, and Dave T was with them in those days and was bi-boxual even then.

 

I'm frankly appalled at your blatant attempt to incite boxist prejudice in this group. ph34r.gif

 

But does that also mean that we can't be rude about p*a*o a**ord**ns?

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One of the first inspiring English Concertina players I heard was Dave Townsend - a friend at university introduced me to a new Buckinghamshire ceilidh band he was very fond of called the Hemlock Cock & Bull Band, and Dave T was with them in those days and was bi-boxual even then.

 

I'm frankly appalled at your blatant attempt to incite boxist prejudice in this group. ph34r.gif

 

But does that also mean that we can't be rude about p*a*o a**ord**ns?

 

It's been joked many times already.

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I was a bit mystified why this topic was posted twice, so I merged the topics. We're trying to cut down on duplicate posts; let me know we can take one of these posts out. Thanks.

 

Guess we're getting an early start on April 1st?

 

Ken

Me too! ( mystified) Thanks for spotting Ken; it could be UN ICA covert operatives at work!

Plese just kill the one without the photo - unless I have to do it which don't know how... :)

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One of the first inspiring English Concertina players I heard was Dave Townsend - a friend at university introduced me to a new Buckinghamshire ceilidh band he was very fond of called the Hemlock Cock & Bull Band, and Dave T was with them in those days and was bi-boxual even then.

 

I'm frankly appalled at your blatant attempt to incite boxist prejudice in this group. ph34r.gif

But does that also mean that we can't be rude about p*a*o a**ord**ns?

Nothing wrong with piano accordions.

The problem is all those people who only play them
forte
.
B)

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One of the first inspiring English Concertina players I heard was Dave Townsend - a friend at university introduced me to a new Buckinghamshire ceilidh band he was very fond of called the Hemlock Cock & Bull Band, and Dave T was with them in those days and was bi-boxual even then.

 

I'm frankly appalled at your blatant attempt to incite boxist prejudice in this group. ph34r.gif

But does that also mean that we can't be rude about p*a*o a**ord**ns?

Nothing wrong with piano accordions.

The problem is all those people who only play them
forte
.
B)

 

I think you are talking about Concertina players, no?

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